Letting go

For some reason, I feel like I get more insightful at night.

Today, I was cleaning. And during said major cleaning overhaul, I found two letters from an ex. Both were from quite long ago. One was from when I was a freshman in college, and the other was definitely from a few years ago but I couldn’t give you an exact timestamp on it.  I’m gonna guess about 3 years… maybe 4.

As I sat and read these letters, just because I was curious as to what was in them, I was amazed at how things can completely change.

 

The I-want-to-be-with-you-forevers. The I’ll-always-love-yous (Sing it, Whitney). The I-can’t-wait-to-spend-the-rest-of-my-life-with-yous.

Looking back on it now, I just feel like these things are weird to say. Promises you’re not sure that you can keep.

I mean, I want to believe you can say these things and mean them. I want to think that in my next relationship, whenever that may be, I’ll get to the point where I feel in love and will make these promises. I want to believe in them. And I do believe that at one point, we all get to that place. Maybe I shouldn’t think too heavily about a letter someone wrote when he was 18. We’re all a little goofy at that age.

Oh, and in case anyone was wondering, I threw these letters away. I’m in a really good place emotionally now, and I don’t need them anymore.

With this post as the final thought, I am letting the rest of the past go.

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